Supergirl
Originally Reviewed on September 17th 2006
I've heard of them, movies that are so bad they're good? Well I think Supergirl qualifies. After popping on the tape (my video store didn't have a copy on DVD) I immediately wondered if someone slipped me a mickey? Because I was certain I was hallucinating.
Supergirl opens on her home planet. Which is like some hippie commune. Peter O'Toole plays this Zen artist/inventor who will be the accidental destroyer of the world. Unless Kara, played by Helen Slater, can fly to Earth and retrieve something called an Orgasmatron, or Origamidron or something of that nature? It's actually a little black ball with lights. Before Kara flies off though, we get to meet her mom. I only mention this because Mia Farrow gives a side splittingly bad performance in the part. Listening to her wrap her tongue around formal dialog with that New Yawk accent is delightfully hilarious.
Now that we have our flower power groove on, the Omnigong naturally winds up in the hands of a witch… that's right, a freakin witch -ah sweet madness! Faye Dunaway plays the witch Selena with scenery chewing relish, and she is joined by henchwoman Brenda Vaccaro. The great Peter Cook is also there as a Professor who wants to get his hands on the spinning ball of doom. And we briefly get a glimpse of Dunaway's followers, who are a strange collection of kooks.
Kara arrives on Earth, knocks out Max Headroom and then enters school under the name Linda Lee. Her dorm mate is none other than Lois Lanes sister. Co-winki-dink. After searching for the Ohmygodmatrod she finally comes face to face with the witch and it all culminates with a slow, none too exciting battle where a demon gives Super G the Stretch Armstrong treatment. Ah, hmm, okay --- now what was it the screenwriters were smoking?
Supergirl is a freak show no doubt, but I’d be remise if I didn’t mention that there's also something whimsical and sweet about it as well. While Helen Slater isn't the most expressive actor, she looks good in the suit and it's endearing watching her naive character try and learn Earth’s customs (Such as the cute bit when she experiments with a bra and stuffs it with socks). Slater's SG has a quiet strength and she projects an innocence that serves her well - as when Kara experiences the flush of first love, or has to deal with a society that isn't as enlightened as her home world (the scene where she is confronted by 2 creeps).
This movie hasn't been warmly received but you know what, I had fun with this flick. Call it a guilty pleasure or whatever but I liked it. And if you're fascinated by hallucinogenic train-wrecks, Supergirl should be right up your alley.
Of Note: Anchor Bay released a limited edition 2 disc DVD set a few years back, which included the international cut (which adds more characterization, restores the delightful 'flying ballet' and is considered the authentic version by most) as well as an extended directors cut. This extended version is mostly additions to the intros and outros of scenes. A few new bits of dialog that generally restates what’s already been (or will be) said. There is one additional sequence, where a bully confronts Linda Lee, but overall none of this adds anything to the movie, and is of interest only for us fans of the film or character. In addition to trailers, TV spots and galleries, the DVD includes a 16 pages booklet, filled with lightweight material. An interesting commentary track on the international cut by director Jeannot Szwarc and Scott Michael Bosco and the 1984 "Making Of" documentary hosted by Faye Dunaway. It's a cool look behind the scenes, and we get to see Slater in a different version of the costume during her screen test (pictured right).
Steel
Originally Reviewed on September 2nd 2006
In the comics John Henry Irons fell from a construction site he was working on and was saved by Superman, who afterwords instructed him to "Live a life worth saving" - After Doomsday killed Supes, Irons emerged as the armored hero, Steel. The film version doesn't appear to exist in this Superman universe (there is no mention of the hero) even though it originally was suppose to be a spin off of a planned Superman/Doomsday film, which was never made.
The story tells of a retired weapons designer (Shaquille O'Neal), who creates the Steel amour after he sees gangs are now using the weapons he once created. The main baddie Steel squares off against is the guy who is selling the gangs these weapons - Nathan Burke (Judd Nelson).
"Steel" looks a lot like a made for TV movie, probably because it was directed by a made for TV director. Kenneth Johnson, who created the hit shows, "The 6 Million Dollar Man" and "The Incredible Hulk". The flick is rife with corny jokes and the dialog floats like a lead balloon. Annabeth Gish, who plays Steels wheelchair bound comrade in arms, is a decent enough actress as is Richard Roundtree as Uncle Joe - but Shaq, weeeelll, lets just say he's a slightly better actor than Anthony Cordoza (Sky Divers, Red Zone Cuba) and leave it at that.
Though savaged by critics and reviled by many viewers, Steel isn't the worst superhero movie ever. It's weak, yes, but it has a good heart. There's a nice message about the bonds of family and community responsibility. The actors seem to like one another and have good chemistry together. So while it's no classic it's difficult for me to hate a movie as well meaning as this (and it certainly doesn't take as infantile an approach to its problem as Superman IV did).
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(he was the son). "Date" was riffed on episode 602; the featured film in that episode was titled "Invasion U.S.A.". In that movie there's a short scene with the original Lois Lane's, Noel Neill and Phyllis Coates in the same scene, playing ticket agents.
Lyle Talbot, who was Commissioner Gordon in the 1949 Batman serial, is Lex Luthor, and he does a good job as Superman's arch nemesis. He's an evil genius in this incarnation, and while -as in every serial- he hides in a cave and has his goons do much of the dirty work, he's more proactive and formidable than Spider Lady. Talbot comes off forceful.
